The Journey With The Relationship Counsellor; Simeon Malachy

It’s another amazing episode of the “Journey With…” Today we are hosting Simeon Malachy, a great and amazing personality. He is a relationship counsellor. He will lead us through today’s journey. Get ready to learn lots of amazing facts about himself and relationship in general.
Note: Questions are in green colour.

It’s a privilege having on this episode, sir. Please tell us who is Simeon Malachy?

Simeon Malachy  is a relationship counsellor who specializes in counseling people on building Godly relationship that leads to a joyful marriage where mutual love, oneness, mutual respect and harmony thrives.
I also help people overcome their dark past while guiding them through maximizing their present lives in order to make it meaningful and impactful. This, I do via writing and counseling. Amazingly, I also offer courses on gaining mastery in the kitchen. 
I’m the founder of “Exceptional Singles Network” with the vision statement, “Raising sound minded singles to achieving excellence in life and in marriage.”
Wow!  That is great. Can you tell us, as a young boy how was growing up like? 
My growing up was fun and adventurous. I did stuff most kids did, I was really exposed to books because of my parents’ profession. My dad, a Journalist, My mum, a teacher. I had lots of meaningful memories and crazy ones too, in summary my growing up was awemazing. In my early teenage years, I became a bad boy, until I was saved by Jesus Christ. 
This is interesting. So what about the dreams you had at a young age. Do you see yourself achieving any?
I loved football, and still do. I wanted to become a football manager, I’m still working towards attaining this dream of mine. Secondly, I dreamt of being a Journalist at some point in time in my young age, a sports journalist to be precise. I will start a sports blog soon.
Awesome! Welcome to the blogger’s club in advance. Someone said you can’t know what you love until you know what you hate. So tell us what inspired your love for relationship counselling and what do you hate seeing in relationships that made it a sphere of interest?
I have always wanted to see partners have a healthy relationship where mutual respect, love, harmony thrives. I was surrounded with lots of failed marriages and relationships, I took it upon myself to change the narratives in relationship and help partners with principles to building a long lasting commitment where love, mutual respect, trust, communication, joy, etc thrives. A commitment that when it grows into marriage, it will never end in divorce nor see a partner’s sanity consistently abused. My goal has always been to help people build a lifetime commitment right from the courtship phase as long as they are compatible for each other.
This beautiful! A selfless attitude, I must say. Okay.  So when you realized your interest in relationship, how did you go about it?
When I realized I had interest in helping people lead in their relationship, I positioned myself to be seen via Social media. I started using my Facebook wall to share thoughts and ideas on building healthy relationships. I grew visibility and became known, I started organising online masterclass and webinars, I also helped my friends by counselling them in their relationships, and when they applied what I told them, it really helped them. I’m now visible in almost all social media platforms especially on Facebook.
That’s great! What is your #1 success habit? What can you say, is the biggest factor that has helped you to be successful at what you do?
Helping humanity in anyway i can has always been my daily purpose, and at such I have to maximize everyday by doing a thing or two that will impact the lives of people around me.

Tell us about “Exceptional Singles Network.”

Exceptional Singles Network is a Facebook group. We add lasting value to Singles with Godly principles and proven ideas to live Exceptionally in key areas of their lives.
Our vision statement is, “Raising sound minded singles to achieving excellence in life and in marriage.” Our mission is, “Changing the narratives and raising exceptional individuals to fulfill purpose and become exceptional spouses and parents.”
  Click the link to join the group: Exceptional Singles Network
Great indeed! What are your words to teenagers about relationship?

Grow your relationship with God. Make friends that encourage you to do things that doesn’t go against God’s principles. Focus on growing friendship not relationship, there’s time for everything under the sun. Chase God, build friendship, and grow your mind by investing in personal development daily. Read, learn, unlearn, and relearn. Don’t allow your emotions and feelings guide you, let God guide you. 
Really great and insightful words. Tell us, what’s your definition of a Godly committed relationship and what does it take to build one?
 A Godly commitment is one, where God is at the centre of one’s commitment. To build a Godly commitment relationship, one has to first know God and make him first in his/her life, he/she has to court someone whom Jesus is a mutual friend to him/her, too. There has to be consistent communication, love, trust, selflessness, from both partners, mutual respect for each other is important too, same as forgiveness, etc. To build a Godly commitment relationship, you need emotional mastery, A committed relationship with God daily, and your actions must always be influenced by the Holy Spirit.
Wow! I must say, that is gold. So, alot of singles often feel really bad about not being in a relationship. Do you believe being single is something to get all worked up about? 
Single-hood is a beautiful phase in life in which we are given by God to groom ourselves to become the best version of ourselves. Not being in a relationship shouldn’t take away one’s joy. Maximize your single-hood by building your relationship with God, maximizing your earthly potentials and building friendships. Chasing purpose is wiser than starting a commitment relationship especially when you’re  not mentally, emotionally, and spiritually ready. What you do with your single-hood will largely affect how your later years will be. It is wiser to avoid a relationship and chase purpose, than to avoid purpose and chase after relationship. At the right time, you will fall in love and people that chased purpose will be more fulfilled in their relationship because they maximized the major part of their single-hood. 

Awesome! I got to read a book in 2018 which changed my perception about being single. I learnt that being single is a gift of time especially for one to build his relationship with God and get his priorities right. As a relationship counsellor, what can you say on this?

You’ve said everything that is to say. Single-hood is the first phase to chase Godly causes. When we do that, the rest of our lives will be super beautiful. I advise singles to seek God, to know who they are and what they were sent her on earth to do. If you are yet to discover your earthly purpose, you’ve nothing doing in a committed relationship. Until you know who you are, you will never know who is best for you. Court someone in whom your earthly purpose aligns, it doesn’t have to be necessarily same, but it should align. The best time to discover our early purpose is in single-hood, knowing God is key to discovering one’s earthly purpose. I will summarize by saying, If you don’t know who you are, you have no right in trying to know the opposite sex to start a commitment.
Interesting! Some individuals often believe all they need is relationship to complete them. Do you think relationship completes a man or a woman? 
Relationship does not complete a man or a woman. Single and whole should be every single person’s goal. That’s imperative, we should “Get a life before thinking of getting a life partner.”
What can you say about the causes of breakup in relationships?
Incompatibility among partners, deceit, lack of healthy communication, inputs by only one partner, abuse in all forms, etc.
That’s true. From acquired knowledge, I got to understand that having a happy married life is beyond the “Falling in love feeling.” Can you shed more light on that? 
Love is not a feeling, it is beyond that. It is a commitment. You don’t love your partner based on how you feel, you love him/her because it’s your obligation to do that even at the lowest moment of one’s life. Like my greatest human influence, Dr. Ravi Zacharias will say, “Love was never intended to be free. It doesn’t boils down to romantic phrases or sentences, but sacrifice.” Marriage is a lifetime commitment. There’s no walking away. A person needs more than love to succeed in marriage. Loving each other is good but it is not enough to keep you for life. You need to be Compatible, additionally, mutual respect and emotional maturity is important too. Like Ravi Zacharias will say, ” Don’t be deceived by the flutter of the heart. Love is a commitment that will be tested in the most vulnerable areas of spirituality, a commitment that will force you to make some very difficult choices.” It is thus imperative to work on ourselves and equip ourselves with Godly values and virtues that will help each and every one of us to succeed in our marriages.
Wow!  This is really insightful. How many books have you authored, the titles and how can we access them? 

BOSSING IN THE KITCHEN – Your Guide to Making Tasty Meals at Home and Spending Less on Eating Out. To get a copy, contact me via mail or any of my social media accounts.
That’s beautiful. Do you think there are necessary books everyone should read on relationship?
 1. ‘When God writes your love story’ by Eric and Leslie Lucy.
2. ‘Redeeming love’ by Francine Rivers.
3. ‘I, Isaac, take thee, Rebecca’ by Ravi Zacharias
What is one piece of conventional advice you disagree with most strongly on relationship?

There is nothing like, ‘Love at first sight,’ rather it is, ‘Attraction at first sight’. Don’t fall in love ‘At first sight,’ know him or her deeply before you decide to start a commitment relationship.
Wow!  This is interesting and insightful. What was the hardest decision you ever had to make to reach this feat? 

I had to walk away from a high paying career that would mean an end to my counselling journey. 
That’s a tasking one I must say. What has been your biggest client success story?
Leaving a toxic relationship of about 5 years, she met the love of her life after a year after, she’s in her second year in marriage, she’s blessed with a kid and they are living in oneness and harmony.
Awesome that’s really beautiful. What does a typical day in your week look like?

 I pray, I cook, I read the scriptures, I read two chapters of three books on Personal development, I rest, I visit YouTube, I write, I counsel, and I never stop loving people and adding value to lives.
That’s interesting. Your Facebook bio tells you are good with the apron and kitchen utensils. Tell us about your kitchen skills.
I love cooking. I learnt this awemazing art from my Grandmother, I have grown to become an incredible cook. I boss in the kitchen over every meal I cook. Out of my love for humanity, I decided to help individuals who are struggling in cooking a tasty meal, by writing my first book,  “BOSSING IN THE KITCHEN – Your Guide to Making Tasty Meals at Home and Spending Less on Eating Out”. This book is the first of it’s kind. A masterpiece book it is. I also offer paid courses on how to perform miracles with ingredients, and importantly how to boss over every meal one prepares. 

Click the link to attend the virtual book lunch. Join The Booklunch

Really awesome! How best can an individual who desires to be successful earn from his talant? 

Position yourself to be seen, grow your visibility on the internet, own a tribe, show up daily and give value, package your ideas and proffer solutions to problems in there, sell and never stop repeating the process.
Insightful! If you are to give everyone collectively, one advice on change, what’s that one change  would you advise individuals to make right now, especially on relationship?
Grow your commitment with God. Grow in Godly values and morals and treat your partner with intrinsic worth.
Apt! Amidst this covid-19 lock down, what is your advice on self-growth ?

Learn a digital skill, read, learn, unlearn, relearn, be kind and loving and importantly don’t forget to grow your relationship with your creator.
What are the various handles you can be reached through?

 Facebook: Simeon Malachy
Twitter: @Simeonmalachy
Instagram: Simeon Malachy
It’s really been an amazing journey with the relationship counsellor, Simeon Malachy. It’s an honour having you, on “The Journey With…” sir. 

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